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Opening Up and Allowing Fear To Flow Through Me
The Comfort of Good Sex and Being In Charge
It’s human nature to seek comfort from difficulty. It’s what we learned to do as children. We needed comfort to keep the courage to face a scary world, so we found safety in people, in habits, in places, and in items like stuffed animals, blankets, and clothing.
Even now picking up and considering these objects brings us a sense of peace and comfort. Even though that comfort may be an illusion.
Sex is like this for many of us. We go back to moments of early love, of discovering our bodies, of losing ourselves in pleasure and passion. But sex also comes with something else. Our early insecurities, fears, and very possibly pain, shame, and trauma.
Leadership also brings up feelings of power and comfort for many people. It can give this illusion of control, a sense of dominance, and the comfort of rightness. But it also pokes at our deepest insecurities and doubts about our own abilities.
The deepest practice in life is not to hide or close in the face of fear and pain, but to remain open and soft as it flows through us. This is perhaps the hardest to do during sex, or when your heart is breaking, or when some old fear or pain shows up.
